Intuition

...our intuition and emotions will be our "radar" that something is wrong. When people make us feel guilty, fear, confusion, doubt, stress, and/or anxiety in spite of the kind words they might tell us, something is wrong. --B.J.

I've often wondered about what the proper place of intuition is in our lives, and what exactly is intuition.

It appears to be a quick primitive brain system that allows us to sense what other people are feeling through nonverbal cues and mirrors that feeling in our own bodies. A problem with intuition, though, is it seems to be prone to errors from biases, assumptions, our own internal characteristics/tendencies, and general conditioning. For example, if I get anxious before making a presentation in front of a large crowd, and I intuit that a speaker is anxious, am I projecting my own feeling or is that really what the other person is experiencing? Due to the fact that we are all more similar than we care to admit, it's just statistically probable that the speaker is actually feeling anxious because she or he is similar to me, so if I feel that way, so does the speaker.

Perhaps intuition isn't about sensing their nonverbal cues; perhaps it's just a process of projecting ourselves into their situation and inferring their internal state based on what we would feel.

I suppose it could be a combination of the two (internal and external), and with so many variables, it's amazing our intuitions are on target as often as they are.

In the context of this quote, though, the point is made that we need to use our feelings to respond more intelligently to the environment. If we don't feel well inside, there is a problem in the current situation, and instead of just trying to ignore the feeling or suppress it, we need to find the deeper cause of our inquietude and respond with this broader understanding.

Emotions, as a concept, have been stigmatized. We pretend that they aren't of the same value as thoughts, particularly in "professional settings." Even when we say, "put your emotions aside," what we're really trying to do is get the person to put their assumptions aside (that are leading to their hostile/defensive emotions) so they can reconsider a certain circumstance, which will then allow them to have a broader view that changes their emotional state. Every action we take is to produce a desired emotional state, but we often feel compelled to provide a list of "legitimate" (conceptual) reasons that we are going to do something.

When I was preparing to quit my job, I really had to make the case to my family and friends that my work was impinging on my sense of ethics and values, my health, and my overall mood. These costs were irrational burdens, considering that my only benefit was a paycheck. With the assurance that I could survive for a few months sans paycheck, they became supportive of my decision to resign.

If I had said I was completely unhappy, that wouldn't have been as compelling, but that's really what my quitting was a result of. My intuition told me "something is wrong" so I had to leave. The sad part is how long it took me to arrive at that decision because I didn't heed my intuition so readily.